The Secret Life of an American Teenager

at the moment i am addicted to that show. watching first season. ben is so adorable :) buh sadly im also the kind of girl who would just fall for ricky in an instint. sigh...

AND IM SO PISSED AND ANNOYED AND MOODY.

one. cuhs im on my period. which is ending today im hopin :)
two. CUHS MY FUCKEN AUNTIE. fuck lemme get this story in here. that bitch got me working at her restaurant like it nothing. dont get paid and shyt. i work here buh NOT HER SON OR DAUGHTER. and well it would make sence cuhs im living at her house BUH FUCK THAT. WE CLEAN HER WHOLE FUCKEN HOUSE AND SHYT. i think i should get some kinda MONEY?! and she fucken a bitch yelling at me all the dam time BITCH U GOT NO RIGHT TO YELL AT ME CUHS I AINT GETTING PAID AND I DO MOST OF THE WORK HERE. that bitch just driving all her dam customers away that fucker all calling me crazy now just cuhs i wrote "ONLY ONE CHEF. please be patient. sorry" on a paper and sticked it on the window" WELL IM SORRY BUH ITS TRUE and ALL THESE PPLZ COMING IN HERE GETTING MAD CUHS OF THE LOONG ASSS WAIT!! and then she goes yelling in the dam kitchen saying "SHYT JUST TELL THEM TO GO GO GO. GET OUTA HERE" and she aint even the chef her husband is. and fuck she cant do shytt. all she do is yell. SHE IS SUCH A BITCH. and the whole calling me crazy aint the first strike. just the other day i took this tables order. but then it was a lot and so i told them that its all in big plates and so they wanted to change the order. and then THAT BITCH was all yelling at me for being nice to a customer. saying its their fault and they would just take it home and SHE ONLY CARED BOUT THE MONEY. THE FUCKEN REASON SHE AINT KEEPING NO DAM CUSTOMERS MAYBE?! she charges the dam food a LOT. and when little kids or teenagers coming in with little money she wont even give them like 50cent off. STOP BEING MEAN MAYBE YOULL GET MORE PPLZ!!?!? today there was a family with a little two year old in here waiting for a long time and i felt sorry for them and i gave the little girl ice cream. SHE ALMOST MADE ME CHARGE THEM. WTF?! buh she shut that big mouth of hers after the pplz planned to come back. the only thing keeping the other customers here are the food. the food is nice. buh that dont make up for all the dam attitude u kno what i mean? ugghh. buh nice service could make up for the food ya digg? shytt i feel bad for the pplz who come in here. you could tell right away if someone got the cash or not and im always wayy nicer to the pplz with kids or the ones who only order a little and watching every bit you know what i mean? hehe. i like it here other than HER. i can stand working her for free and cleaning her house. BUH NOT THE DAM YELLING. i mean I AM HERE FOR FREE. i get it if i got paid and you fucken yelled your head off. BUH FUCK YOU I AM HERE ON MY OWN YOU AINT GIVING ME SHYT,. I DNT NEED THIS FUCKEN ATTITUDE. bitch. so i decided im not gonn help them. fuck that shyt.

buh then i feel bad for my mom whos also working here she get paid and yelled at like a pig and shyt. and SHE PREGO. idk how she does it man she superwomen!! ima help her out :) cuhs shes my number one hero. i found out how i can tell if i really cared for someone. If i just start thinking what i would do if they were gone from this world. if i start crying. I'd know. (:

Money is Never Everything.

Lately I have encountered quite a few peoples who just dont understand that. Its driving me crazy! Money is never everything. I find it funny how even my own family thinks money IS everything. Its not. I find that its nice knowing money isn't everything. I mean. This makes me adore all the stuff I can get without money. All the love, all the feelings, everything. Money is an object. Not something worth our hearts. Someone told me that money can buy heart transplants. Does that REALLY mean you can buy a heart with your money? To me heart has two meanings. Heart as an object. And Heart, as something more. A feeling, something you can feel, but you cannot see. The same as how someone would describe the wind. Its free, priceless, Both ways... If you know what I mean.I think There are a lot of things that you have to gain, thats not connected money-wise. And I am Glad I noticed that before its too late. Many peoples dont ever get a chance to notice that, or they finally come to a point that they realize "oh, money is just an object" when they are reaching the end of their days. But I realized this young, and I am glad for that. And I feel sorry for those of you who still think money can buy everything. Theres no where a little more hardship cant get you. Money should not be our top priority.... though it seems that way to a lot of peoples.
Just my opinion :) dont hate.

70

wow havnt been on here in awhile. cobwebs starting to grow!
^^hahah i find that funny. cobWEBS.
lol im a super dork wtf...
dam i miss everyone so. its not fair. i find that i grew up some :) NO SADLY NOT PHYSICALLY. buh mentally.
wait is that how i say it? mentally sound.... mentally retarded? well thats a possiblity.
Things are funnier withOUT the LOL[s] (: at times.
im really confused with myself lately. i been back to the same ol' boring wenxi back then wehn i used to live in cali. well the one that feel like.... idk.
i just know that when i am in arizona i feel like i fit. and here. i just dont know. maybe cuhs its summer and nothings happening. hah...
buh i think i should just leave everything in Gods hands.
i miss claudia and our talks :(
&& reena and our laughs.
&& CFM and our.... times (:
&& skoo.
wow.
and i thought of rico today. how fun.... I saw a guy that reminded me so much of him at the beach yesterday. Such a goofball. I literally just stood there laughin at him x]
Oh man. Girl get a gripp.
hahs.
Psst im here in the dark alone tryna not get caught by my auntie and uncle while watching illegal porn.
now you go figure that one out...
LOL.
ohkay nuu buh im here tho and everyone upstairs is snoring their little heads off and im here tryna blog cuhs i JUST FEEL THE NEED TO OHKAY?!
dnt judge me mister!
hahaha.
ehhh im bouta fall asleep thos.
Come back on here whenever i can. And im tryna remember the things i wanna blog bout... buh i never do. so you guys just have to suffer until i am once again on the computer 24/7 and can blog whenever i wanna heh.
dam another case of the hicups. the 5 time today!? SHYTT. my cuzin scared me and said that hicups can mean internal bleeding.....
=.=
btw i been watching House way too much! I keep thinking something is wrong with me. all paranoidd. NUUU MAKE IT STOP ;O

Sore.

All over. Its killing me...!!!
heh so have i told you that i was working at my cuzos restaurant yett? well yeah im helpin out here and wow i discovered that i love smiling and saying hello. it just brings me mood up ya kno? :)
buh i also hate bringing others down... like when i have to keep telling them "sorry... they are getting to their order right away" tho its gonn take another 20 min at least. Bleh...

and idk super bipolar lately! well duhh. T.O.M
well almost i guess. i at least hope with all my heart that its my T.O.M! I DONT WANT IT TURNING TO BE NO H1N1. :O DONT SCARE ME!

Havnt Written in Awhile;

Hmmm... Today i suddenly thought of a fren of mines... We were close for a while and well she was bi. She was all tryna hold my hand giving me hints. Im just all thinking what woulda happened LOL.


Been watching House lately. Stay Clean!

There are times when things are Just Unreplacable

Dangg I havnt done my devotion in a long time....

man days are... idk
im gettin a tummyy!!
hahhaa.
and the signal i DONT get is killing me
i dont like thinking about the whole moving bullpooop.
Maybe i should be Brave again and come to santa cruz to start something new again. Like the step I took toward Chavez. Cuhs That turned out nice... Right?
Bleh Im tired...


Gonn head to the beach tmrw again to get signal!! :D
hahaha.
Oh i miss them so much... i should do my summer assignment just in case.. Cuhs i still wanna go to the first few days of skoo. :) And well it dont hurt to read a new book or two hahs.
I think ima start off with a house on mango street.
Oh how sweet, reading on the beach. hehe on the sand. under the sun. with my sunglasses on HAHA.

&& wtf?! i dont even got my sunglasses no more :( so blehh.
anywahyss.
thanks for listening to my blab :D
been a blabber today haha.s
lalalala.
Lets go pirate mateyyy.
Arrrgghhh!
-.- this reminds me of something haha.
....

oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARK!

im late buh blame my signal.
&& lol if u even ever read my blog.
wth happened to ur myspace? pssh.

blabbbbb :)


GoodDay Mateyy. Arrrrrgh

Originally To My FilaMese :)

hehehe that just sounded like a awesome title :D


buhs anyways;
WHERE THE HELL YOU GUYS AT!?
dam grlies im all the way in cali santa cruz right by some beach i dont even know the name of and im STILL on this lovely blog right here buh u guys; wahh!?
lol sorries bout the late text replies btw. got no signal buhs im going to the beach like every single day just to get signal so just leave me a txt and ill get back at ya!!
&& dam i gotta get my voice mail set up!!
idk how o.o it wont work when i called it so its bugging me lots; especially how i dnt get signal so i wont even kno who called.
buh seriously?! ive already had this number for awhile and hah still didnt set that dam thing up. You woulda think i shudve already since i never get signal where i usually am. AKA MY HOUSE. its sad how i would never kno who calls...
WHAT IF ITS HIM!?!?
lmaoo...
x]


buh anywhos. Im getting really fat. O.o i feel it. not even kidding. buh who to blame!? I am in cali, great weather. Nice breeze. && HAH AWESOME CHINESE RESTAURANT WHERE I CAN EAT ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING NO COST. AND I CAN BE LAZYY!! all i gotta do is drag my sister to places which i dont really mind. I would seem stoopid going to the beach myself anyways. and since i got kids with me. no weirdos will be coming up to me yeah? LOL. BAD THING ISS. peoples think im a young mom of 2. and that i am old and well... old. LOL. and that just adds up under my "mature" list of my face and well. now HAIR.
oh that last few sentences were confusing buh yes. You guys know how i already look mature or well old? like my face. and now the hair adds to that! AND NOW 2 KIDS. lol great family yes? :)
Id send you our family portrait in a few. LOL
and talking bout family photos.
we all should get our photos done at the studio!!!! hah idk how we gonn come up with some spare money for that buh we shouldd :D hayyeee sexayy!?
LOL.
model status babes;


oh man anywaysss. I think i was talking bout fatness awhile ago? lol well yeah. My stretch marks are growing!!!
:O
haha joana; like TIGER STRIPES!!! how you like me now babe?
LOL
oh hell yeah even better than a tattoo. cuhs this dont hurt :) LOL
anywayssss;
ima go and gah im too lazy to post up on my personal blog so i think ima be a smartass and just copy+paste.
MUAHAHAHHA.
evilness.


I guess ill text you tomorrow once im at the beach again. Oh they are having a fireworks celebration or something for 4th of july!
OMG AND YES HAPPY FORTH OF JULY!!!
HAVE FUN BURNING UP THE HOUSE WITH THE FIREWORKS. hehehe (:
if you guys have any bad feeling. it might be because i burnt up the house with them explosives and is probly dieing so dont take chances and PLEASE CALL 911!!! lol.


(: GoodBye Mates. Arggh.
Feeling pirate.

thoughts on life;

oh i was watching the persuit to happyness yesterdayy;
so old o.o
buh dam cann i say the little kid was cutee?
LOL.
it wasnt a happy movie much... well kinda. idk
its one of those movies that... idk what to expect?
well actually rewind taht; i did expect something
I EXPECTED THEM TO TURN RICH LIKE REAL FAST
LOTTERY OR SOMETHIGN!?
lmao.
buh then it didnt happen til the very end;
see i cant say i like this movie... cuhs it gives off a feeling that just dont fit quite right... like bad things just keep happening
see i see life as a breather. Like...
Bad things and good things have to happen equally... Bad things is like breathing in, and good things is like breathing out. Too much bad things is like holding your breath. And so goes for happy things. Both things just need to balance out to live. and well. While i was watching the persuit to happyness, It was like i couldnt breathe in my chestt;
hmmm i feel smart todayyy :)
wellss ima head to the beach so my phone gets signal. hahs!

GoodDay Mates [WTF MATES!?]
=x

Dot Dot Dott

Temporary residing in Santa Cruz... Dont wanna move!!
DAM YOU!
...
they right here tryna get my auntiee to buy a house and let us rent it wtf...
while we got a house in az that we couldnt even pay the dam shyt off;
UGGGH.
i dnt wanna move :(
dont let me move.



...


oh i gotta stop all this shytt;
&& forgot the mobile updates for now cuhss; I dont even get signal here.
Tmobile just aint the shish no more; lol not in Calii.
Buhsss anywaays; ima get busy eating all the food here in my aunties restuarant aha; YOU ALREADY KNOW?!


(: GoodDay Loves.
ill update soon.