Promise/Purity Rings

I am considering of getting myself a promise/purity ring... One for virginity and another for soberness. Sigh I did a whole night of research on it o.o like what kind of ring works and how to work the vow and all that. Promise ring is just a ring to remind yourself of a promise between you and another person. A purity ring is to remind yourself to stay abstinence until marriage. In this case I am vowing to my family, friends, & God.
I went and asked on yahoo answers of how the ring works and whats up && all that good stuff o.o YAHOO ANSWERS FTW!
Someone mentioned that the ring doesnt do anything, its still a promise with or without the ring. Wow >.> got me thinking.... Do I really need to rely on an object to make a promise? Isn't that promise supposed to be just me and whoever that promise is to? Why am I putting that promise onto an object?
>.>'
cept then see then I was reminded of my poor commitment skills.... && amy said getting a ring is a step into that commitment.
sigh I don't know what to do....

&& widd the parents. I don't even feel like explaining shit to them.

Hah

I still remember how it started off as a joke, you were just an excuse. You were a subsitute for him.
& what are you now?



Its happening again, I can feel it, & I don't like it.

"Peach Flower Luck"

ayaia.

Justin Bieber(:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTCm8tdHkfI&annotation_id=annotation_254874&feature=iv



you just HAVE TO HAVE TO HAVE TO watch this.
Its not justin bieber im sorry
its something way more adorable than him ;3 AWHHH;

Yeah, it really IS Lame

how I tell myself that I am not ready, for a guy to be in my life with the title of "boyfriend".
Haha CAN I BLAME THE EX AGAIN!?
oh no.
thatd be too unfair. && plus, if he sees this, I WILL BE DEAD! haha. Me & Him both knows that it isnt his fault. Its just all the things I "been through". which aint shit o.o but it turned me to this. I used to be the little girl who believed in fairytales. Actually I still do, in a way. Yes I still wait for that day when a prince will actually come on his horse(POWERlol) & pick me up with his muscos. Bring me away. We can go elope. We can have the honeymoon of our dreams. We can travel the world.
But I've grown enough to 'know' that my prince charming will show up later in life. Not this moment. & yes yes its just no harm to-
but reallyyy.... theres no point. Whats courtship without the want of marriage with that person?


oh now I just sound really corny.
GJ.
lemme take all that crap back.


ooop lost train of thoughts.
GG

SPAM SPAM SPAM!

remember when this blog used to be the shizz? ;3
haha.
Yeah, i Used to be the shizz.




lets point out the irony.
when you say the shizz. you know you aint shit.
lol(:

...

WHOA. so i was reading some of my old comments that I got on here and there were some freaky links. nah its their signature... or whatever.
the hell man.
gtfo.


WHOA WHAT IF I SENT THAT TO....
LOL
WHOA I HOPE NOT.
cuhs i remember asking them what it meant.
the hell
oh gawd now im just blabing.
havnt blabbed on here for so long.
hows everyone doing? :DDDD
Yeah its 4. 3 more hours to go. AND STILL NO HOMEWORK DONE. OHNOOO~!!!!

She is such a cutie!

14 years old!? I am so jealous.... Hehehe. She reminds me of STACEYY >;D

BLAME THE CAFFEINE;;

Temptation?

FML.
STAY SINGLE STAY HAPPY.
(:





-.-'

oh what can i say?

i suddenly want you in my arms right now...
I am so bipolar. Blame the caffeine! At first I felt like I wanted to get out and have a great time (: hehe another one of those nights. & then now I am so bipolar and feel so lonely. I want you right here widd mee ;x
cept.
gawdam.
Relationships are too confusing. TOO DAM CONFUSING. I am NOT ready for no relationship, back upp. I aint gonn go and do some useless relationship when I know it aint gonn stay. Its called wasting time & feelings. Whats that for when I know I can't stay tied down.. whats all that for when I keep having doubts? Why put myself in a situation I KNOW for a fact wont go well?
Sigh.
Cept right now I really want you by myside, holding me ;x
I miss you like hell.
thats very bad ;x


I know I have commitment issues, & you know that. But seems like you have the same issue too. Its stoopid how I can get jealous so easily, oh thats another reason why I am NOTTT ready for a relationship. I get jealous too easily! & LOL I go and say to myself "ayo we aint a thing. Whats the point of trying to stay committed to someone who ISNT yours? Don't show him that he got you. Go have fun". & then I see the look on your face.....
-.-' but I remind myself "hah well at least I got the upper hand...", next thing I know, I have that same look when I see you talking widd some other girl.
Wow what we have, so meaningless.
-.-'

I don't know if I WANT you. I don't know if I NEED you. I don't know anything right now. I DONT KNOW.
But whats the point of all this hurt, when theres no gain at all? Why not at least try it out and gain something right..?
ADSFASDFASDFASDF.


fml.
wow so much on "THINKING" about guy sober again.
GEEZUS.

I hate it when you are walking right, feeling the best and everytrhings good, then you suddenly slip/trip/fall.. OMFG. lol

Like Gurrrl do yo thangg~
>;D LOL.


I did that today. I was walking down the street and I was on the phone widd mama, she was rushing me! & I was bouta cross the street and i slipped and i was like "WHOA" buh i didnt fall. thats so embarrassing!!


its like
catwalk catwalk catwalk down that stage baby >;D
-BAM-
fell off the stage.
LMFAO!
thats so embarrassing. CAMERA FLASHING EVERYWHERE! CATCHING EVERY SINGLE INCH OF MOVEMENT. LOL.


&& please hold yourself from that laughter of your facial expression.



RUNAWAY RUNWAY:

I Rarely ever drink coffee, but it is my second time today.

dada just made me coffee (:

I am thinking about going guy sober again

ohwheee. It worked out pretty alright last time, even though i kept breaking the rules. there were still boundaries holding me back right? Haha...

Sour Patch Kids

its funny how the other day I was just reading the March version of Seventeen, and it mentioned how guys would pep-talk themselves in the mirror. Is it bad that I do the same thing?

Every morning/night while I am cleaning myself for the day/night. I find myself smiling, winking, and making funny faces in the mirror.


(: hehe the moments of childhood.

The Other Duck

Whoa.
(: Duckateers need to get some of these. haha.

wendu BLUUHD.

will you shoot me if i wear blue?
LOL

Some things should be kept in mind.

I guess you can feel me

drifting away from you. && yes I do feel you trying to pull me back, which makes me bounce back farther away, WAY farther away. Hun its not the same anymore.... So don't do those things to me. Love is such a big word.... && it kills things.

Bullshit.

Appreciate

That's something I need to learn how to do, but I guess thats something the whole human race need to learn isn't it? I realized yesterday night that I should stop complaining about all the money I didn't get but instead of what I got for New Years. Oh come on wenxi, take a dam step back and look at what you are saying. This is foolish. I tell myself to be appreciative and then turn my head and there I go complaining again. It's crazy. I thought about how just this weekend I was so mad because no one said thankyou to me when I baked the cake, but then I realized I never thanked my mom for anything she's done for me, for the family, for us. && believe me... she's done a LOT.
Wendu its ohkay ;x I feel ya. Sometimes we just want someone there to say Thankyou, Goodjob, You were very helpful! etc. Its crazy how us human beings don't care about anyone else but us huh? I mean, we say we are better than animals, we say we can think in a more complex way... But is that really how it is? Look at us. All the fights over stupid things. All the murders and torture of each other. The way we treat each other.. We are savages, savages in the human body who is supposed to be better than animals, cept we ARE the animals.
I want to add another thing to my to-do list.
-To hug everyone I see for a day
-To say thankyou to everyone I see for a day
-To say your beautiful/handsome to everyone I see for one day.

haha. It could even be for a whole week, different things each day. ;3

I doubt I will be able to do it ;x not here, not now, not me..... -.-'

I heard I give off that Egyptian Queen look

LOL.
;3
oh gee that boosts my self esteem up. Hahah. && ms. irwin commented on that one time! ilher (: shes so awesome. hehehe.

Oh Meanies

You know that feeling you get while crushing? I love that crushing. I don't trust myself to walk. so let me chase, don't stop running.

But I love that feeling though;; The feeling of crushing. The temporary high (:
I look everywhere for you. Maybe its a excuse to look away from all these other guys, because in my head I tell myself these other guys are bull. Having a crush is like giving me a goal. these goals help me stay on track. I feel so foolish sometimes..

Oh anyways. I guess this will be a collage of random things :)
Sometimes I get emotional, bipolar, sensitive, maybe I am on the moon o.o
Everything seem to blind me now, all these foolishness. Why can't it be simple? Why can't we be nice to each other? It doesn't have to be this way. No being mean and bullying others is NOT the best "im cool" image there is. I hated that image. It was me in the elementary-early middle school days. Wow those days I wish I could just leave in the past, cept now that I came back to this place, it is like I have to go back through my past. I love alone time on the bus, home, just walking or doing chores. It lets me think. && those times make me realize that, I don't have to be mean just because everyone else is. I can do things my way and hopefully make a change and let others realize that we CAN love. && in this case, love is a very wide-range word. No hun, I am not talking about "the love of your life" I am talking about, share the love, share the joy.(:

oh gee I got distracted && I lost my train of thought. sigh... Need to keep focused. I got so much homework too ;x sigh.

Temporary Down

Sigh. Switched my URL. What can I say... I had my reasons.

New Song~

Well old actually? Falling for you- colbie caillet. I think thats how you spell her name... I love that song ;3 haha this song indicated the stage of when I was tryna get over you by forcing another guy into my stream of cuties...
&& now that guy.
oh wow.
LOL.
what can I say....


Today I was being kind of bipolar about yaa, no way will I say I am in chokehold. Haha... No way >.>' it aint even that serious. but then the way everything is... It seems like it IS serious && that.
=.='
anywhos. I was just tripping.
but then.
This song gives me the courage to fall in like with you :3


OH so yeah. I really want to ditch my faceboook/myspace/twitter. I want to delete it like PERMANENTLY. && just never look back. But I know I will >.>' myspace is the only connection I have widd everyone in arizona. && facebook, oh thats just for stalking. LOL. && twitter. I like to update? LOL. -.-'
thing is. Theres really no point for me anymore! I am a loser so no one bother to socialize with me on facebook. Myspace... LOL. I don't even bother. Man I remember when myspace was MY DAY. Like literally. I would be on there 27/4 with all the status(s) & bulletins & the songs & layouts. WHOA. && twitter? LOL I just like to update. I barely have any followers ;o
XD
So really, what is the point? I just have it but like, I barely use it. I mean... LOL LIKE FACEBOOK!? I go on just to join groups and be-fan things. I don't comment others or care or actually use it to its advantage...
I need to just delete it all and get it over with. Its wasting my time. && its givin easy access to me, no good. I rather you take your time and come find me and we talk face to face. Believe me, it really is a lot better. :D


Myspace/Twitter/Facebook/AIM < Texting < Phone call < Meeting up.
Should be the rule of life.

Disgrace

This is bullshit. why are you trying to pick a fight? This man wasn't even being fuckin racist. Just because you are African American doesn't meant everything is offensive toward you. && Foreal? Are you calling this "white ass" racist or prejudice when these "black" girls in the background were going "pinky" & "beat his white ass" && all that mutherfucking crap? Ohkay look. I guess thats not your fault. I just thought you guys were the same race so then you guys must think the same and act the same and all that crap, oh talk about stereotyping!
LOL.
take the fucking sarcasm.

Ohkay look, stop being an ass. Its fuckin embarasing when African Americans get so dam offensive on everything and take it as 'racism'. Yes we get it, you guys were once slaves and that others once hated your race. && some still do now.... But then FUCK its not like you guys don't say shit about other races! SO STOP BEING THE BABY OF THE RACE SYSTEM. Its not like other races don't experience racism. Some may think that African Americans experience the MOST racism but REALLY!? That is such a lie in all the places I've lived. Some of you just take things up the ass and fuck widd it. Show some senses will ya? Like I said, not everything is racist. Stop being the fucker. (I am saying for all those that likes to pick fights & take shit up their ass. Not the whole race, because I know for a fact that there ARE those who actually THINK. && I am not saying that it only goes for Africans. I say this goes for everyone. Fuck calm down)
"Keeping It Real" wtf is keeping it real?! Haha 'the streets'? Fuck it if you so hood then why you giving yourself a bad name? Giving the 'streets' a bad name. Uggh yeah. If you REALLY from the hood then you would know how to keep your ass alife instead of picking fights here and there and not know what you are getting into.
You are not the only person who knows how to fight. stop embarasing yourself.
&& just to say. the girl in the backgroun videotaping gets me mad. First she goes being racist, which was the supposed cause of this conflict, but then she goes and cheers on the fight. But then the funny thing was how she suggested that he place charges against the old man just because she have it taped. that is hillarious considering the old guy walked away and sat somewhere else, he was doing the right thing. He tried to stay away from the fight. && the African American man walked up to the front where the old man was and punched him first. there IS something called self defense. && you really cannot get sued for that. Stop trying to make yourself look bad, just embarasing everyone else. You are NOT 'cooler' because you are Loud or if you are being Racist or that you have backup or if you have the whole fight on tape. Fighting should not be an entertainment. It is a show of stupidity and inhumane-ness. It shows you are lacking a whole lot of sense & that you have no self control over yourself & your emotions. In this case, it showed that you take everything up the butt and can't be a bigger man about it.
Grow up. You are not some little kid on the streets fighting over a ball. You are a grown ass man up on the bus who was chatted up by another man asking for a fare, STOP THINKING THE WHOLE WORLD IS AGAINST YOU. I THOUGHT THAT WAS ONLY FOR PUBERTY.
Please, put some more civilization into you.

Trippin'

...

One more Added to my To-Do list(:

So today I was going thru youtube videos and I saw responses to ShaneDawsons vidoe about Flaws. They are AMAZING. && Inspiring ;3
Now I just have to wait until steven comes and fix my computer so I can use my webcam again & make a response too ;3 hehehe.
I HAVE TO.
hehe.
Make videos that actually are meaningful to watch, instead of lame videos that make me look high o.o

Lets Go Elope >;D

&& get married on November 11, 2010. at 11:11 A.M
heheheh.
just because.
what if 2012 really happen right? ;3
&& if it don't. We can divorce, and marry again on February 14. 2014 at 2:14P.M (:
because its such a nice number. lets go do that. make all these memories on all these nice numbers. hehehe


&& yes. It would be legal by then (:

Babe, put that frown away... There is a rainbow in the sky; Promises from God.

Its crazy what some peoples who do to others

the one who you thought you loved, the one who loved you. the one who you thought you would spend the rest of your life with...
its crazy.
Thats why, "its not their business. Its our business". If you can't handle your own relationship business, don't get into a relationship. stop relying on others to take care of your relationships.
You should be ashamed.

(Wow thank God Im learning to be better than this...._)

Pet Peeve

Wendu me&you babe, we are so alike (: hehee.
I hate the word Love. I mean, I don't hate it. But I just don't need it right now. I don't need it or want it or will I accept it.
Like wendu mentioned. "i LIKE you" is cutter than "i LOVE you" because LIKE is more reasonable and realistic. I don't want to jump right into it. I want the real thing...

Oh thats pretty lame

I barely write on here anymore... Sigh.
I try to as much as possible tho ;x I guess.
How is everyone?
Me? I am doing better. Last few weeks were bull. Now I am back on some new fresh pages & just... at least making an effort.
Hehehe (: & so far its been good other than how my family pisses me off.


My sister was so cute today, karyna. Hehehe she had one this bunny easter suit thingie. Well if you know us asians, we don't care what it is, we just wear it as long as its warm. well the parents anyways... haha. && she was crying but she was in a bunny suit so it was like the cutest little thing ever!! ;3
awh.
Did I ever mention that I thought teenage pregnancy was cute? LOL. I mean, I am not encouraging you to go have a baby oh dear NO! But if you were really to get pregnant, take it as a blessing not as a curse (: because a little life is the best gift you can ever receive.
LOL "MY BABY GOTSA EAT!"
(: stay abstinence


Cherish all the embarrassing moments, at least you get to laugh about it later on :D

11.11 i want food. I WANT FOODDD!

LOL WHOA EMBARASING!

so my last post... was supposed to be for my private blog. oh thank God it didnt have any OTHER info on there. but still... HOW EMBARASING! hahaha.
ohman ;x i hope you didn't read that. did you? HAHAHA.
fail fail fail.
><'

I am really bad with words

Maybe everything does happen just inside my head. I am REALLY bad with speaking... I found out so lately. I don't have any confidence in myself. I say things quietly when I am unsure of myself, and that is a lot of times. yes I may always seem loud and laughing and smiling, but man. There are so many times when I look at myself and think I am worthless, useless, a piece of waste paper... Well at least waste paper can be recycled. Dammit. Wendu baby me too... I feel like I am blocking others out. Blocking them... First I blamed my materialistic self. I told myself that I was just texting too much or using my ipod too much, just so I don't have to blame myself directly. I mean, I am not always like this ;O I see myself as a loud... cheerful, smiley person. Cept that is not the case anymore is it? Its back to the old days. I mean. Well thats just how I blame it anyways. What is it now? Do I think I am too cool for them? NO WAY. I think they are way smart and artistic and creative and definitely amazing.... But the way I act, like how I don't bother to make conversation or even have any effort of fitting in. I just keep myself walking like I don't care. Wow. This is bullshit. I am bullshit.
Today in YAAW we were talking about how 15 is a age where... everything happens. It is a turning point. We splitted into groups and got to decide what we think of when we think of the age 15. which is funny because only me & micheal were actually 15, everyone else was older. 17. OLDIES! (cuties too. LOL) but then see. they were pretty to-point. 15 year olds are HILLARIOUS. we already start thinking about "the one". We want to 'fit in'. We want to 'fit out'. we want to 'change'. To be 'original'. We want to party, to drink to smoke to do drugs. We want to have sex, feel the freedom, be 'badasses'. We think it is the end of the word. That everything is against us. that no one understands. That we are all alone and that everyone hates us.
hahaha talk about facts.
I felt like I didn't fit in or that they are just wasting time on me because today we went to watch the Two Year Old Gentleman. & it was such a nice show cept see I couldn't see deep into it. I mean... ohkay some things I didn't know how to enjoy, how to appreciate. I loved the way they moved, the way how their body just went BAM. && hayeee, there was a pinoy guy shirtless. Owhee the way that he moves....-drool-. ewhie. Lust.

ASDF

Yes yes hun lately I been feeling pretty down too... It was like yesterday when everything was nice and awesome and I didn't have a care... But these few days have been pretty bad. You know how I should be feeling blessed, even for bad days? Uggh yeah. Lately Not Really. &I feel so bad & useless at times like... Gawdam. Today was your birthday mama & its sad that this family can't even afford to bring you out for a nice dinner or something... Not even flowers. & the sad thing is, I wasn't even gonn be home today.. -.-'

Lately I have been doubting myself a lot... I remembered how in Health Ed last year we had this lesson where theres a piece of paper right, & for everything little thing that brings our mood down, we rip a part of the paper off, according to how bad it makes us feel. && everything that makes us happy, we add some more paper back onto it. See... no matter how small it is. Anything that happens, it does affect that piece of paper. && lately mines been going out of stock. Man. I don't care how small or unimportant those things may be, THEY STILL EFFECT ME. Dammit. I have been cranky & moody & tired, so tired, & IT AINT EVEN MY PERIOD. THAT SHIT PASSED MMKAYS?! So whats with all the PMS symptoms? :O

&& I hate that feeling you get when you could have done something but then never got to it. Because I am such a fucken wimp? Asshole? Jerk? Bitch? I SWEAR. I am hating myself a lot lately... I need a break. From everything. GAH STOP BEING A LITTLE BABY WENXI!

>.> GRRR. "You are your own's worst enemy" So dam true -.-'

You know how the 'adults' keep telling us that we will regret the bad things we did when we grow up? Well see I already do. Like how I didn't do my best, how I FEEL SO DAM STOOPID ALREADY.



so so stressed. need to scream. need to shout. gah. GAHHH!

Need a stress ball -.-'

Valentines day soon!

ohkay ohkay. days like these make me miss. miss the times ;x GRRR.
ohkay ohkay whats there to miss right>? hoes. hahah. I get so jealous of those cute little valentines! DAMMIT. No no no. Have to keep my mind to myself.
"stay single. stay happy"
yes yes yes. I agree! JUST NOT ON VALENTINES DAY.


grrr :( hahaha. no. get away. no. stay away. NO NO NO.
"I AM SO MAD THAT THIS YEARS CHINESE NEW YEARS IS GONN BE ON VALENTINES DAY!"
"NOT ME. I am happy. This way I don't feel like crap just because I don't have a valentine."


LOL!!! oh you cutie cutie. Hahhaha. true that hun. Buh lets be each others valentine. WHo needs boys?! ;O WE CAN GO BI. LOL.
or like ke$ha says, lets go TRI >;D

Stay Single, Stay Happy

Why you gotta ruin my day like that?

saying those things.
It is not needed. So why come over here and make me sad?
....

I Am Such An Ass -.-'

I HATE IT WHEN HANNAH SNITCHES ON ME!

ADSFASDFASDF.
WHAT A HOE.
HOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOEHOE!!!!!
;O
GRRRR. I AM SO MAD. GRR GRR GRRR. NO MORE DORA FOR YOU. NO MORE HANNAH. NO MORE! NEVERRRR~!@#!@~

Error.

..........